Wednesday, January 2, 2008

School started today. It feels strange that I'm a JC2 student now, considered a senior. I still felt nervous being around people on the first day of school. Then it hit me that maybe it is because I'm not confident in myself. When teachers ask me questions in class (like today), I freak out and lose my head. I often wish I had the courage to speak up in class. I'm trying to now, bit by bit. Why do I lack self-confidence? It might be because, as the youngest child, I've always had others make decisions for me and I'm not used to speaking up for myself. That doesn't mean I don't have an opinion. I do. It's just that I find it hard to voice. So I really want to work on that. Well, new year's resolutions usually don't work out but I hope this one does. That plus the one where I said I'd exercise! I say that every year but never get round to actually doing it. Oh, and my other resolutions include cutting back on excessive spending, helping people in need (though I'm not sure how), eating healthily, curbing slacking, spending more time doing art and writing and getting down to serious studying. I'll be a saint if I can achieve all this.

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